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| A SPECIAL FEATURE BY LINDA RONDEAU |
*Lisa grabbed Dave’s white hankie conveniently located on the couch. On any
other day, she would confront his slovenliness. Today she was grateful for the
soiled linen as she wiped away the steady stream of tears from her eyes.
She reached for another cardboard box to finish packing Ashleigh’s
belongings. She arranged the assortment of musical toys and stuffed animals,
unconsciously picking up a white velvet Teddy Bear, squeezing it tightly against
her chest.
It had been a year since Ashleigh came to live with them. Six years previously,
Lisa and Dave felt a call from God to become foster parents. Lisa always wanted
a big family; but after years of waiting, tests, and unanswered prayer, she faced
the possibility she might never conceive.
Lisa knew that God had a different plan. Before she and Dave were married and
moved to the city, she worked for a foster care agency. She knew the urgent need
for loving homes in which neglected children could find a nurturing environment.
Dave readily supported the idea, prayerfully promising to adopt any of the
children in their care should the opportunity arise. After months of specialized
training, Lisa and Dave eagerly awaited the first placement.
Baby Michael arrived within a few months. Lisa was thrilled by the joy of holding
a tiny one close to her heart. He was their son, no matter how long God allowed
him to stay. Lisa found contentment in the hectic, busy days an infant’s needs
dictated. A few years later, Cecil arrived. Although he was classified a special
need’s child, their love expanded to meet the challenges.
Within a few months, one-year-old Darren entered the home already squeezed by
demanding schedules. He was welcomed just the same. They were told from the
beginning that Darren would most likely return to his mother. Lisa and Dave
respected the close bond between Darren and his birth mother, doing all they
could to help preserve the relationship. Knowing from the start Darren would not
be a permanent member of the household did not prepare them for the
indescribable wrenching when the social worker took him away.
Soon after Darren left, Lisa and Dave received an urgent call from the foster care
agency. They had a little boy, age 2, in need of a permanent home. The boy,
James, had been in care since birth and was now released for adoption. Lisa felt
urged by the Spirit to examine the possibility. Her previously childless home now
bulged with toddlers. Michael’s adoption was finalized, and it appeared they
would also adopt Cecil in the near future. They loved James the minute they first
saw the affectionate, loving youngster.
Diaper changing, household chores, meal preparation, cleanups, home schooling
Michael, and discipline needs dominated days and nights. Yet, Lisa felt a longing
for a little girl. She was grateful for the three wonderful boys God entrusted to
them but could not extinguish this unrelenting desire for a daughter.
Within a few weeks of James’ final transition into the home, six-month-old
Ashleigh came into their care. Lisa and Dave fell in love with her gurgles and
wide-eyed grins the minute she arrived. They relished in her spunk, curiosity, and
good nature as she crawled behind her big brothers, following them from room to
room, and getting into the act when Daddy played roughhouse. Her presence
seemed as natural as the sunrise. Lisa never considered the confusion created by
two family additions within a month a burden. She refused to entertain any
thoughts of when or if Ashleigh would return to her birth mother. Echoes of the
pain she felt when Darren left where stifled by the pleasure she found in Ashleigh’
s antics.
Lisa knew the cost of being a foster parent was bearing lifelong heart bruises when
a child was returned to uncertainty. She could not endure any more pounding,
especially when it came to her only little girl. She pressed the Teddy Bear even
harder as she agonized in prayer, “God, why did you give her to us, only to take
her away?” She released the plush toy in obedience to an incomprehensible
command, wiped her eyes again, and sealed the box.
That evening, Lisa sat solemnly during the Ladies Prayer Circle. Her heart felt
as if a thousand pound foot had stepped on it. She thought it best not to mention
Ashleigh’s leaving. Her grief was so pervasive she feared the saying of it would
unleash a torrent of emotions leaving her unable to care for the other youngsters in
her charge. The leader passed around a bowl of Bible verses. Each participant
was instructed to take one out to read to the group.
Lisa was stunned when she opened the piece of paper to read, He tends his
flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to
his heart (Isaiah 40:11a). She gasped at God’s perfect timing, no longer able to
restrain the flow of tears. Sharing her need, she was comforted by her friend’s
prayers on behalf of Ashleigh, rendered not in selfish desires but for her ultimate
salvation and the salvation of her birth parents. She knew God would fill this hole
in her life with other experiences; yet, Ashleigh’s imprint would always remain.
God allowed this precious jewel into their lives for a purpose yet unknown.
As the prayers came to a close, Lisa felt a release from the tightness that
compressed her spirit, finding solace in the knowledge that God had a plan for
Ashleigh, even though that plan would be fulfilled apart from her watchful eye.
*This story is true, however, some details have been changed to protect the
privacy of those involved.
For reprint permission contact Linda Rondeau
lindarondeau@gmail.com
other day, she would confront his slovenliness. Today she was grateful for the
soiled linen as she wiped away the steady stream of tears from her eyes.
She reached for another cardboard box to finish packing Ashleigh’s
belongings. She arranged the assortment of musical toys and stuffed animals,
unconsciously picking up a white velvet Teddy Bear, squeezing it tightly against
her chest.
It had been a year since Ashleigh came to live with them. Six years previously,
Lisa and Dave felt a call from God to become foster parents. Lisa always wanted
a big family; but after years of waiting, tests, and unanswered prayer, she faced
the possibility she might never conceive.
Lisa knew that God had a different plan. Before she and Dave were married and
moved to the city, she worked for a foster care agency. She knew the urgent need
for loving homes in which neglected children could find a nurturing environment.
Dave readily supported the idea, prayerfully promising to adopt any of the
children in their care should the opportunity arise. After months of specialized
training, Lisa and Dave eagerly awaited the first placement.
Baby Michael arrived within a few months. Lisa was thrilled by the joy of holding
a tiny one close to her heart. He was their son, no matter how long God allowed
him to stay. Lisa found contentment in the hectic, busy days an infant’s needs
dictated. A few years later, Cecil arrived. Although he was classified a special
need’s child, their love expanded to meet the challenges.
Within a few months, one-year-old Darren entered the home already squeezed by
demanding schedules. He was welcomed just the same. They were told from the
beginning that Darren would most likely return to his mother. Lisa and Dave
respected the close bond between Darren and his birth mother, doing all they
could to help preserve the relationship. Knowing from the start Darren would not
be a permanent member of the household did not prepare them for the
indescribable wrenching when the social worker took him away.
Soon after Darren left, Lisa and Dave received an urgent call from the foster care
agency. They had a little boy, age 2, in need of a permanent home. The boy,
James, had been in care since birth and was now released for adoption. Lisa felt
urged by the Spirit to examine the possibility. Her previously childless home now
bulged with toddlers. Michael’s adoption was finalized, and it appeared they
would also adopt Cecil in the near future. They loved James the minute they first
saw the affectionate, loving youngster.
Diaper changing, household chores, meal preparation, cleanups, home schooling
Michael, and discipline needs dominated days and nights. Yet, Lisa felt a longing
for a little girl. She was grateful for the three wonderful boys God entrusted to
them but could not extinguish this unrelenting desire for a daughter.
Within a few weeks of James’ final transition into the home, six-month-old
Ashleigh came into their care. Lisa and Dave fell in love with her gurgles and
wide-eyed grins the minute she arrived. They relished in her spunk, curiosity, and
good nature as she crawled behind her big brothers, following them from room to
room, and getting into the act when Daddy played roughhouse. Her presence
seemed as natural as the sunrise. Lisa never considered the confusion created by
two family additions within a month a burden. She refused to entertain any
thoughts of when or if Ashleigh would return to her birth mother. Echoes of the
pain she felt when Darren left where stifled by the pleasure she found in Ashleigh’
s antics.
Lisa knew the cost of being a foster parent was bearing lifelong heart bruises when
a child was returned to uncertainty. She could not endure any more pounding,
especially when it came to her only little girl. She pressed the Teddy Bear even
harder as she agonized in prayer, “God, why did you give her to us, only to take
her away?” She released the plush toy in obedience to an incomprehensible
command, wiped her eyes again, and sealed the box.
That evening, Lisa sat solemnly during the Ladies Prayer Circle. Her heart felt
as if a thousand pound foot had stepped on it. She thought it best not to mention
Ashleigh’s leaving. Her grief was so pervasive she feared the saying of it would
unleash a torrent of emotions leaving her unable to care for the other youngsters in
her charge. The leader passed around a bowl of Bible verses. Each participant
was instructed to take one out to read to the group.
Lisa was stunned when she opened the piece of paper to read, He tends his
flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to
his heart (Isaiah 40:11a). She gasped at God’s perfect timing, no longer able to
restrain the flow of tears. Sharing her need, she was comforted by her friend’s
prayers on behalf of Ashleigh, rendered not in selfish desires but for her ultimate
salvation and the salvation of her birth parents. She knew God would fill this hole
in her life with other experiences; yet, Ashleigh’s imprint would always remain.
God allowed this precious jewel into their lives for a purpose yet unknown.
As the prayers came to a close, Lisa felt a release from the tightness that
compressed her spirit, finding solace in the knowledge that God had a plan for
Ashleigh, even though that plan would be fulfilled apart from her watchful eye.
*This story is true, however, some details have been changed to protect the
privacy of those involved.
For reprint permission contact Linda Rondeau
lindarondeau@gmail.com
| THE COST OF LOVE |
He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart, he gently leads those that have young. (Isaiah 40:11 NIV). |